Monday, February 3, 2014

To My Big Man

Monday, February 3, 2014
Yesterday, it's been hell for me. You said things that totally shocked the hell out of me, it hurts deep into my soul, literally. I know it's all my fault 'coz I can't get things done, I'm impossible and petulant and possessive and a disgrace to you. Inspite of all that, fights over smallest things, physically hurting you and all our differences, you still stayed and do your best to be with me for the past 10 months but I pushed you to your limit. I honestly don't know what to think and do anymore, well, I guess my past bad experiences made me like this. I'm truly deeply sorry for all that I've done but for you and me, for us. All I could think to do is that I'm willing to change, yeah, I know you heard this a lot, my false promises! but this time around it's gon' be real and true.

I've come to realize and feel real grief since those hours thinking I might not see you and talk to you ever again after all that happened. I realized it's time for me to low down my pride for the one I really love who never gave up on me on my worst attitude. Ugh! I hate drama but damn! I'm so damned and it's my freaking fault and I'm goin' crazy if I keep this to myself.

Glad I'm still lucky that you still accepted me after all, and sure this time I'll make things right baby. I said before we parted after our broke up yesterday that breaking up is just okay with me because I saw it coming and I believe that 'people just come and go', but truth is, it's not, at that moment I want to say that 'I'm sorry and please accept me' but it's not that easy for I'm afraid you'll reject me and that'll totally break my heart into pieces and my soul might die right there and then. It's true people just come and go and I might just accept it but I want you to be the only exception to that, I can't even bear thinking about not being with you. I just cant.. I love you too much to walk away. And please don't change, but if ever your feelings for me had changed, I can promise that I'll understand and I'll do my best to make things just fine for this relationship...


1 comment:

No harsh comments please. Be nice. :)

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